I got the idea for this sketch after listening to some 90’s Hip-Hop, specifically listen to Busta Rhymes and his hype man ‘Spliff Star’. Then I just took that idea and wondered how living w/ a Hype Man (which is essentially a motivational accomplice) would be.
Thanks to Matt & Anthony Engelbrecht for being a part and doing some amazing improv (especially the bedroom scene).
There are 4 Types of Rappers that we all know, love, hate, despise, and secretly want to be like.
The 90’s Rapper
This is the rapper that thinks that Rakim & Eric B are still the President, and hope that Pete Rock & C.L. Smooth will get back together. Baggy pants are still a staple fashion, and using complex metaphors over a classic snare drum & clap mixed with a boring chorus – are the ingredients to ‘Real Hip-Hop’
Top 90’s Rappers:
The Gangsta Rapper
This is the Alpha Thug, spends his drug money on working with the popular producers and the best studios. Loves Scarface. Is not afraid to take pics or videos of himself with guns, knives, and using banned narcotics. Likes to use a wide range of simile’s to explain how he will shoot and kill you, your family, and even retroactively kill your deceased great-great GrandFather from the civil war.
Top Gangsta Rappers:
The Swag Rapper
This is the Rapper whom gets his haircut at least once a week, cause you, black ppl’s hair grows back very fast. Always has the newest shoes and gear, frequenter of the Luxury Car Rental stores – cause appearance is everything, right? Makes sure to buy bottles upon bottles in the club, pouring liquor into his entourage’s mouth, and strangers. And always takes a bad bitch back to the hotel – then when its time to checkout, its back to Mama’s house … Until next weekend, and ‘We Do it again’.
Top Swag Rappers:
Any rapper that is highly materialistic (Yes, its a lot)
The Emo Rapper
This is the rapper that likes close fitting jeans, and low V-neck tops. Working out at the gym isn’t that important, food isn’t as important either. Comes from the suburbs, but knows about hardships …. Talks about real problems like bitches that snort too much of your cocaine, those type of issues. Likes to sing too, and thinks they are ‘Pseudo Rockers’ so will have a skateboard and guitar too. Also this rapper is very expressive with his feelings and emotions, sometimes a bit too much.
Top Emo Rappers:
Yeah, we know there are more types of Rappers that could possibly be added to this list, feel free to list those types in the comments below.
This argument has been discussed for many years, and I’d suggest that up to the 90’s, the hands down argument was that Men were the better drivers than womenn; and that can be attributed just to the rise of equality/feminism. In the 60’s, Men were driving more than women because Men worked and the women stayed home, so by definition of exposure/repetition, its safe to say that Men were the better drivers. But as Women started going to work and being more independent, its safe to say that we have reached a point where there are just as many Women drivers as Men. According to a survey by Carrentals UK, they have attested that Women are better drivers than Men, and produced the following findings:
57 per cent of men had been involved in one or more accidents compared to 44 per cent of women
45 per cent of 36- to 45-year-old and men over 65 years old had been caught speeding
60 per cent of men over 65 had been involved in an accident, compared to 30 per cent of women in the same age group.
Probably, a better way to look at whom are better drivers can be boiled down to whom can be distracted the easiest; and for Men and Women, they both have vices that cause them to be distracted while at the wheel.
Distractions for Women
Rearview Mirror: Women use this not to really check vehicles behind them, but to check their lipstick & massacre
Mobile Phone: A second not checking the phone is a second of missed Instagram pics from their friends
Distractions for Men
Women on the Street: If there is a hot chick standing on the street, we will definitely break our necks to catch a glimpse
Women in the Car: Self-explanatory
Remove the distractions that both Men & Women have and then they are both good drivers that can navigate the road with efficiency – hopefully.
A method to dump your partner w/o being the ‘Bad Guy’
I’m sure we all have had that experience of being with someone that just became too needy over time; at first their needy behavior was ‘adorable, but then it grew into a weird beast that is both weird and sometimes creepy – with constant text messages and phone calls. Well, there are a couple of ways to deal with the needy:
Drop ‘em like its hot – the fastest & equally coldest method
Tolerate – answer the constant text messages/phone calls
Flip the Neediness – YOU become the needy one!
Now this is the one that is most interesting, ‘Flippin the Neediness’. Defined by comic Justin Laite, this is the process of becoming even MORE needier that your needy partner so that they start realizing that YOU are the neediness and with the hopes that they eventually dump you because they can’t handle your needy behavior any more. So for instance if they call you 5 times a day, then you start calling them 20 times a day. Send them over 50 text messages a day; describe your toast, coffee, brunch, lunch, and so on. ‘Like’ and comment on all of their FaceBook posts everyday. Eventually, they should be sick of you and will start to think that YOU have a problem. This is almost an ideal situation if it works because it removes the burden of dumping someone that is emotionally unstable. Classic.
Has anyone tried this before? What has been your findings? I would presume it would be awesome.
We get it, life is busy. And sometimes, its just easier to stop off at your favorite Fast Food Chain and shove thousands of calories & sodium into your mouth for $2.99 or less. But, there are options for creating quick ‘Creative Meals’ for people on the go.
‘Ghetto Cooking’ sounds bad, but its really just a method of fusing together cooking ingredients based on a few simple pillars – the main pillar being whatever is in your kitchen (seriously). There are 2 dishes that you can try that will not only save you time in the kitchen, but will save you money.
Spaghetti & Meatballs
This is a simple recipe for the classic ‘Spaghetti & Meatballs’, but without the Meatballs. Here is what you will need:
> Spaghetti Pasta or Ramen Noodles
> Hot Dog Weiners
Prep Time: 5-10 minutes
Gourmet Beef Patty
Everybody loves a Beef Patty, but what about taking it to the next step and creating a Gourmet Beef Patty sandwich? Now, you are probably thinking ‘Patty & cocoa Bread’, nope – that is not what is happening here. We are putting the gourmet ingredients into the Patty itself. Here is what you’ll need:
> Beef Patty
Prep Time: 7 mins
Hope these recipes will be added to your culinary repertoire – if not, hope you at least learned some creative Ghetto alternatives to cooking!
Comedians Sylvana & Justin do battle once again as they stick up for their respective genders to discuss which sex has better skills behind the wheel. They both make convincing arguments, but I’m going to have to say that Men are the better drivers because we aren’t preoccupied with looking at OURSELVES in the rearview mirror.
Another comedy project from Urban Comedy Network in the POV series, go subscribe and share this video, support please if you get a laugh.
Another comedy video from my Urban Comedy Network Family featuring comedian Anthony Engelbrecht. This was an interesting shoot because we had a script that we had to modify on the fly, so most of the content was impromptu, and we met some interesting people showing us their variations of the Gangnam Style dance – which included booty smacking and all. I had fun editing this video, which is a rarity.
All my Ladies that have weave, whether Yaki, Remy, or Synthetic will be able to relate to the ‘Ten Weave Commandments’. One thing that is evident about hair weave, is that it is a multi-billion dollar industry and women invest a lot of time and energy in trying to find that right weave.
So personality @nadinemarieg created a funny parody called the ‘Ten Weave Commandments’, and they are helpful tips for any woman struggling with their weave:
1. Never let your tracks show (self-explanatory) 2. Always travel with your weave glue (or hair pins in case a track falls out) 3. Always pat your head when it’s itchy (patting won’t pull out the tracks or make your hair messy) 4. Never lie and say “it’s all mine.” 5. Never make your weave too greasy (there’s nothing worse than a greasy weave, believe me) 6. Always travel with your brush (weave gets frizzy. Gotta keep it looking lush) 7. This rule is so overrated: keep your Remy and Yaki completely separated 8. Gel down your edges if they’re nappy (weave and nappy roots — that’s just tacky) 9. Nine should’ve been number 1 to me; ALWAYS know when to take out your weave! 10. Buy a wig just in case. If your hair is looking rough, put on a wig to cover it up.
Hopefully these tips will help some ladies to living a good life with their weave, because no other relationship is as important as a woman and her weave.
Another sketch for Urban Comedy Network, written & produced by me; I got the idea while trying to figure out how many different types of Rappers are in my ‘Heavy Rotation’. I actually came up with around 7, but logistically, I could of only filmed 4, and plus, I didn’t want to do all that editing. Maybe a part 2 will be on the horizon.