Tag Archives: Work

On the Strength Of

Feats-of-Strength
Recently had to ask some people that I work with a strange request: “can I have a woman dump a bag of flour on you?”. Yes, the bag of flour that you make bread & cake with. At first, I thought that I would be looked at as a ‘madman’ – or to some, ‘madder’, but I decided to ask anyway. Sometimes I was hesitant, other times I was blunt with it. I found out that most people at first found the request strange – as I expected. Some said ‘nah’, which I knew was gonna happen, however more people than I thought actually agreed. No compensation was offered, nothing was promised, which led me to ask the question as to why they would agree to such a request. And the only answer I could possibly fathom is the apt title of this post – ‘on the Strength of’.

One could only agree to such a request if they fully believed and supported the individual making the request. This had me almost kinda baffled because sometimes, or most times, I question and doubt my self, ideas, and concepts, but it is almost overwhelming (don’t worry, not gonna cry) to know that there are a group of people around me that will ‘ride for the cause’, primarily because they believe in ‘YOU’. And its odd, and something that I have to change. I should be my biggest believer in my self before anyone else is. We all should aim to have that same mindset.

.:: LiBM ::.

Nerban’s constant flow

nerdwgraf

Keep Flowing

Tips to keep the mind running

 


Following links in Wikipeda
Just search a random topic in Wikipedia, it could be a historical person/place, a terminology and/or definition, or a product. Enter in the search string and simply follow the links that are on the first page that you view; since Wikipedia references and links pages based on relationships, you can easily and quickly become informed on topics that you had no knowledge of. And we know that the more knowledge is powerful – even though it may be random topics, this technique should keep your interest for a few minutes … maybe hours (depends how much of a nerd you are).

 


Ambidextrous tries
Pretty simple task that is challenging – try to write with your opposite hand. This is an amazing challenge as it takes you back to grade school as you have to practice holding the pen, arching your elbow in the right position, and then trying to increase your writing speed – this is not an easy task. However, the benefits are paramount as you will increase your concentration and focus, and will be able to write with both hands – so if a corrupt regime cuts off one of your arms, you will be able to clearly write your memoirs.

 


Commenting
Some of the funniest and interesting part of the Internet is reading the comments that people post. The voice of the people is sarcastic, crass, lewd, rude, anecdotal, and sometimes very humorous. It seems the anonymity and impersonal communication that the Internet provides has allowed people to say things that they probably normally wouldn’t during face-to-face interactions.

 

.:: LiBM ::.

tan(004) – Road closures cause a logical mess with Paypal

Part 4 in the Expression of foolery:

A logical Mess, Road Closures, Paypal fees

A Logical Mess
Its always the worst when your away from work for a couple of days and your work peer comes over to your desk to do your work and completely reorganizes your things. They say that they were just trying to ‘clean up’ your things, but b**ch, the perceived chaos/mess is subjective – and usually items are strategically placed in certain areas for a reason. Its really rude and abrasive to come into another person’s work area and go through their stuff; business and/or personal – usually they do it to snoop, lames. These types of people need to be dealt with; severely and swiftly (you know what I mean).

Road Closures
Driving on the highway especially in the summer is an interesting time as construction narrows lanes, roads are unpaved, and they always have signs indicating that a certain part of the highway will be closed during a certain time between certain intersections. This is a gross logical error, because if you are traveling eastbound, the signs will tell you the closures that affect eastbound traffic only; but, the driver most likely will need to know of any construction occurring on the westbound lanes (as it will be rare that the driver will travel eastbound again after returning westbound). Am I the only one that has noticed this? Does it not make sense to give notice to the most likely course of actions of drivers?

Paypalery
This will be quick and sweet, but isn’t it odd that Paypal is quick to charge you fees for your transactions whether you are buying or selling, but when you need to withdraw some money from paypal it takes 5-8 business days … Just saying …

.:: LiBM ::.

Presenteeism pt. 2

Presenteeism pt. 2

The Lawyers, Retail, and Chicken-esque ticket writers

This is part 2, check out the first installment below in ‘related posts’, I will be brief, there are a lot of jobs, positions, where people are present, but not really their, and I thought of some more …

Retail Sales
I am sure that any retail associate can vouch for this, but you all don’t really do much work. For the most part, you stand around while potential customers come into your store, and if you are able to muster the energy, you will ask them for help, but usually you won’t. I can’t tell you the countless times that I have walked into a store and have not been acknowledged or greeted – I don’t necessarily think it’s a racial thing, I think on general, most people are just a-holes and view the customer generally as an inconvenience that they gotta help. However, I am hearing with the recession, every retail store from the little guy to the nationwide chains are being more friendlier and improving on their customer service skills because they know that their job/store may get the axe.

Lawyers
Ok, lawyers do work when they gotta read over case studies, and files, and stuff. However, where it is very sweet for a lawyer, is that in some instances they get paid for just being present and not really saying much; divorce hearings, corporate signings, et cetera. Lawyers are paid a ridiculous amount of money just for their ‘perceived retention of knowledge’ when it comes to the law – nice gig.

Parking Enforcement Officers
These are the guys that were not quite good enough to make it as a real police officer, so these guys spend their days messing up your day. They sit, talk on cell phones while driving, text, and wait 3 hours – just so they can give you that $40 ticket. Because of these guys, I always have to look at the clock, because if your even

.:: LiBM ::.

Presenteeism

Presenteeism

I am here, but not here

Presenteeism can be defined as the following:

“20 to 30 days out of the year, people show up for work, but accomplish very little”

Presenteeism is the opposite of absenteeism. In contrast to absenteeism, when employees are absent from work, presenteeism discusses the problems faced when employees come to work in spite of illness, which can have similar negative repercussions on business performance.  It can also refer to the expectation of employers for their employees to be present at work regardless of whether any work is available or accomplished.

After thinking about this concept, I thought of a few industries/professions where this behavior may run rampant, such as:

Government Workers

– If you ever tried to pay a parking ticket, or get something from a government office, it seems like its workers are lethargic, and definitely don’t show no real interest in providing prompt customer service.

IT Professionals

– Ever tried to call your work’s technical support line? Ever noticed that though they are well connected with Blackberry’s and computers, but are never available to assist you? IT dudes seem to always be ‘there’ but are not ‘there’ for you when you need it.

Call Centres

– Ever worked in one of these disaster zones? I have, and I recall being physically there, but mentally in another atmosphere.

Presenteeism is only really applied when one is working at a job that they do not really enjoy – Dr. Ron Kessler of the Harvard Medical School, published a journal that outlined the relationships to depression in the workplace and presenteeism.  His study calculated the costs to the employer when staff show up to work and are not productive as they should be.  I

am sure that many people can relate to this behavior of ‘presenteeism’ as you are most likely reading this blog at your job!

.:: LiBM::.

Sources:
1. http://www.depressionisreal.org/podcast/transcript_show46.php
2. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Presenteeism

Custom Out-of-Office Assistants for the Yuppies

Jealous office women

Custom Out-of-Office Replies

Something to make you laugh for those times at work when you went to send your superior’s head throught the TFT monitor display.

Suggestions for next time you’re out of the office and need to set up an Auto-Reply e-mail:

“I’m not really out of the office. I’m just ignoring you.”

“You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn’t have received anything at all.”

“Thank you for your email, but I am busy ‘poking'”

“When I am finished watching my pirated movie, I will respond to your inquiry”

“Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management”

“Your e-mail will be responded to in priority sequence, enjoy the wait”

“Thank you for your message, which has been added to an email queueing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks and 3 days.”

“I am on holiday. Your e-mail has been deleted.”

“Hi! I’m busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Please don’t bother to leave me any messages.”
“I’ve run away to join a different circus.”

“I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.”


.:: LiBM ::.

Social Non-Conformances, ‘bust de dance’

”Bust de Dance’

Please let me know that I am not the only one that does this.

At times when I am at work, I have to use the elevator to go to various departments, usually when I use the elevator, it is empty.  And once I step in, its my own space – for that 5-15 seconds of seclusion, I sometimes feel the need, desire, want to ‘act a fool’.  My foolish behaviors manifest itself in several ways:

1. If I am not holding any documents, I want to dance.
2. If I am holding documents, I try to rhyme; using the words I see in the elevator (i.e. ‘Fire Exit’, ‘In case of emergency’, etc.)
3. If the conditions of number 1 hold true, but yet I don’t want to dance, I like to box, or practice ‘air boxing’

I would hope that I am not the only one that behaves in such a way in the elevator, personally I don’t think its that bad, definitely it is a bit weird and unorthodox.  That small amount of time in the elevator, and my unorthodox behavior is probably a good release exercise of all the stress, bullsh*t, and politics that I have to deal with in my 9-5, and in my personal life; it gives me a chance to ‘let loose’ (briefly), and do something without the worry of being criticizied, punished, or admonished for. 

Quite actually, it could be said that what I do is somewhat therapeutic – because almost instantly when the elevator door chimes, and the metallic steel doors open, I smile; partly laughing at my own actions, and partly preparing myself to handle the challenges that will arise.

Anyone does anything similar in the elevator?

.:: LibM ::.

Workplace Etiquette for the Yuppy

Workplace Etiquette for the Yuppy
Some tips for getting through the day

The Yuppy (Young Urban Professional) is constantly on the go; most times though, the Yuppy needs to resort to a full-time job in order to fund their projects. However, the Yuppy has to be careful and walk that fine line of being productive at work, and being productive for their business. Thus, I thought I would share a few tips with my fellow Yuppielites.

Cycler
alt+tab (windows) OR apple+tab (mac)

You have more important things to do than prepare the 3rd-quarter report, you need to check your gmail and facebook. Instead of making it look bait by using your mouse to click back to the work your supposed to do, using alt+tab on the keyboard quickly changes your active window in a smooth manner.

IT Connect

Your IT Department is one of your greatest resources at work, befriend one of them as they can give you valuable Intel and help. The IT department can grant you special privileges, advise you what sites not to visit, and give you a heads-up on ‘crackdowns’.

Avoiding the IDC Symptom

The IDC symptom can be defined as “I Don’t Care”, and is developed when your co-workers start talking to you about trite details: ‘My kids hockey games’, ‘this boss is incompetent because …’, ‘did you watch that show last night’, and so on. My initial, instinctual response is ‘I really don’t care’, and ‘why are you talking to me’, but since we need this job to generate income and living, we need to avoid the IDC’s. Some common ways to avoid the IDC is:- Smile and nod: very effective, but can be deadly because it implies that you are actually intrigued in the conversation, and it shows that you are engaged.- Hmm, ok, wow: also very effective, alludes to you being not only responsive, but implies that you are listening to their every note and syllable

Outlook
Outlook is the enterprise e-mail application that most businesses use because of its powerful Exchange Server (even though Mozilla Thunderbird is better). I know you may have some documents to work on, and opening up MS Word may seem very suspicious as you may have to do a lot of ‘cycling’, however, Outlook can be used as a word processor and has some useful features such as ‘tasks’ and ‘notes’. Better yet, if you are working on a document, compose it in an e-mail, so that even if someone walks by, it looks like you are composing a work-related email.

Punctuality
This really shouldn’t be a point, but its important that you start on time, and leave on time. Because as with all work environments, there are snitches and informers – don’t give them anything to use against you.

With that said, you are the future of tomorrow, get ahead today … at work.

.:: d.b ::.