Tag Archives: attitude

React or Respond?

March 31, 2009 d dot b Leave a comment

Reaction vs. Responding

Spectrum of reasoning

I was listening to some talk show podcast, and they were debating the pros and cons of reacting vs. responding; at first I thought that they were pretty much the same in definition; a course of action after an event, but upon further research, the conceps are evolved. A reaction can be likened upon an impulsive action focused on a narrow part of the overall situation, usually to the exclusion of larger goals and objectives. Whereas a response can be defined as a wiser course of action that considers the complexities of people and circumstances; responses aims to accomplish goals based on a more through understanding of the whole situation.

Thus, it is safe to say that responding should be the ideal course of response for us mortals, however I believe, and I am sure that many of you probably agree, that we tend to react more than we respond. We fly off the handle, don’t take time to carefully think about the gravity of situations, and our reactions cause tension, animosity, and hate – from others. To give a medical analogy, consider a patient; the patient goes in to their Doctor for a follow-up visit – let’s say that the patient has improved since the last visit, the Doctor will say that your body is ‘responding’ to the treatment/drug. Whereas, if the patient visits the Doctor, and the patient is sick, the Doctor will say that their body is ‘reacting’ to some virus. Thus, this concept of reacting vs. responding can be compared to a negative vs. positive contrast or even further, it can be compared to degrees of reasoning. Many people in your lives who are hot-headed, easily tempered, it would be safe to say react to situations; while those who take time to deliberate the pros and cons, look at the glass both half-full and half-empty, are probably ones to respond to situations.

The classic and most modern example of reaction vs. respond is when President Obama ‘sonned’ a White House reporter in March 2009 when Obama was asked why he didn’t react sooner regarding the AIG fiasco; Obama replied “I like to know what I am talking about before I give a response”.

Take notes.

.:: LiBM ::.

Relationships, Social

Classic Introverts

March 27, 2009 d dot b Leave a comment

Classic Introverts

Bliss in solitary?

Does this sound like you? According to WikiP, this is a definition of an ‘Introvert’:

Introversion is “the state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one’s own mental life”. Introverts tend to be more reserved and less assertive in social situations. They often take pleasure in solitary activities such as reading, writing, drawing, and using computers. The archetypal artist, writer, sculptor, composer, and inventor are all highly introverted. An introvert is likely to enjoy time spent alone and find less reward in time spent with large groups of people, though they tend to enjoy interactions with close friends. They prefer to concentrate on a single activity at a time and like to observe situations before they participate. Introverts are easily overwhelmed by too much stimulation from social gatherings and engagement. They are more analytical before speaking.

Introversion is not the same as shyness. Introverts choose solitary over social activities by preference, whereas shy people avoid social encounters out of fear.

Here is a list of some popular Introverts that you wouldn’t think were such:

Non-Entertainment
Thomas Edison, inventor
Sir Alfred Hitchcock, film director
Abraham Lincoln, sixteenth president
Bill Gates, software pioneer

Entertainment
Michael Jordan, basketball player and celebrity
Jim Carrey, actor
Angelina Jolie, actress
Julia Roberts, actress
Gwyneth Paltrow, actress
Clint Eastwood, actor/director
Charles Schulz, Peanuts cartoonist

I think I would classify myself as a classic introvert, but that doesn’t mean that myself and others are ‘anti-social’; we value our own solidarity more than our willingness to associate with others. And its not that introverts have nothing to say, we only speak when we have something to say; just like Obama schooled the White House Reporter in late March ’09 when responding to a question about why he didn’t react fast enough to the AIG execs bonus outrage, he responded “I like to know what I’m talking about first before I give a comment”.

Now I must get back to writing, reading, and using computers and such …
Lol

.:: LiBM ::.

Sources: Wikipedia.com/introversion

Logic, Popular Culture

That gets a ‘pass’ … really?

March 23, 2009 d dot b Leave a comment

Really? That gets a ‘pass’?

Social Causes for Alarms that are not alarms

I like how we as a society, are very upset and vocal at such news stories and figures like the AIG fiasco; where after billions and billions of bailout money, and causing this economic meltdown, AIG gives out millions of dollars in bonuses – and the public is outraged. I am sure many of us want to go to the barn and get pitch forks and burn down the financial institution; this is an example of acceptable rage and anger toward an institution and/or individual. Essentially, the public doesn’t want AIG to get away with this behaviour or ‘get a pass’; like, oh ya, that is acceptable behaviour, because you know, they are AIG. That logic is not flying, so thinking about that, there are many examples of where some people, situations, events are ‘getting a pass’; the real meat & potatoes of such newsworthy events are not being reported or contested.

For example, this whole ‘Chrianna’ issue (Chris Brown & Rihanna) is finally getting around to talking about relationship abuse, but not enough dialogue is going on about the effects of witnessing or being the victim of childhood abuse – as those that witness abuse growing up, are more likelier to abuse their spouse when they are adults (i.e. Chris Brown).

Snoop Dogg

One of the game’s most influential rappers, a pop culture icon, but let’s be real – how is a self glorified pimp being able to go on Martha Stewart? Snoop has produced successful porn videos, rolls with Bishop Don Juan, smokes copious amount of marijuana, and he gets to speak at the 2009 Nation of Islam march? Its like America said, “Oh, its just Snoop Dogg, that is his thing”, which would lead some to suggest that since Snoop has been presenting his image for over 15 years or so; his longetivity of his image grants acceptance. I mean, I ain’t hating on Snoop, but I can’t believe that he gets a ‘pass’ in this ‘politically correct’ society, he has even been on the ‘The View’ – the most liberal ultra-feminist show.

Snoop on the ‘View’

Dr. Phil/Oprah

Encouraging weight loss is a noble idea, really. Americans are the most obese nation on the planet, I mean I live in Canada, and whenever I am in Anywhere, U.S.A., a small drink size, looks like a large to me. However, in all persuasive messages coming from a communicator, credibility is important – in terms of weight loss, Dr. Phil, Oprah, are not credible. People are more likely to believe someone, believe the message of what they are saying, if such communicator embodies the traits to which they are expressing.

Lil Wayne kissing Baby

How can the ‘greatest rapper alive’ get a ‘pass’ for kissing another man? Remember when he kissed Baby, and his justification was that Baby is like his father, but even if you talk to most Fathers that have sons, they stop kissing their sons after a certain age … well before puberty. In a realm like hip-hop, that is very No-Homo, the hip-hop community has seem to given a ‘pass’ to Wayne, really? Maybe Canibus was right when he talked about the Gay Rapper wrecking havoc on the game. Talk about getting hoodwinked, and now Wayne is supposedly the ‘greatest rapper alive’ with his drug, syrup infested raps.

Kudos to Jon Stewart who recently scolded CNBC for being complicit in this global financial meltdown, he didn’t let them get a ‘free’ pass, but it may be telling of media when someone who is a comedian, is really handling hard-hitting stories that real journalists should be investigating. Some things seem out of context to me at times, and we sensationalize the WRONG aspects of a story or an event.

.:: LiBM ::.

Cre8ive Abstract, Logic

Time Mgnmt for the Yuppy

January 28, 2009 d dot b Leave a comment

Image source Cartoon Stock

Time Management for the Yuppy

Techniques to get the most done

The Yuppies (Young Urban Professionals), especially the creative ones, their Achilles heel has to be that their isn’t enough time in a day to match and/or sustain their ideas. Juggling work, school, family, and social relationships, the Yuppy can at times feel flustered; upstairs, the mind is working at light speed, but there just does not seem to be an abundant amount of time to keep up with the ideas. So the key to this problem, must be trying to organize the ideas into manageable tasks and goals, then creating a plan to attack such. At times, that may be easier said than done, so I have compiled a list of some practiced time management techniques that can help make you the ambitious, creative, and innovative individual that you seek to be:

Contemporary Time Management

First generation: reminders (based on clocks and watches, but with computer implementation possible) can be used to alert of the time when a task is to be done.
Second generation: planning and preparation (based on calendar and appointment books) includes setting goals.
Third generation: planning, prioritizing, controlling (using a personal organizer, other paper-based objects, or computer- or PDA-based systems) activities on a daily basis. This approach implies spending some time in clarifying values and priorities.
Fourth generation: being efficient and proactive (using any tools above) places goals and roles as the controlling element of the system and favors importance over urgency.

For the Yuppy, and much of the younger generation, I think we are currently in the fourth generation where we use the tools in the first to third generation, and we prioritize goals based on its significance to its overall effect or processes.

Task lists are often tiered. The simplest tiered system includes a general to-do list (or task-holding file) to record all the tasks the person needs to accomplish, and a daily to-do list which is created each day by transferring tasks from the general to-do list.

Task List Organization by Prioritization:

An early advocate of “ABC” prioritization was Alan Lakein (See Books below.). In his system “A” items were the most important (“A-1” the most important within that group), “B” next most important, “C” least important.
A particular method of applying the ABC method assigns “A” to tasks to be done within a day, “B” a week, and “C” a month.
To prioritize a daily task list, one either records the tasks in the order of highest priority, or assigns them a number after they are listed (“1” for highest priority, “2” for second highest priority, etc.) which indicates in which order to execute the tasks. The latter method is generally faster, allowing the tasks to be recorded more quickly.

ABC analysis

This technique that has been used in business management for a long time is the categorization of large data into groups. These groups are often marked A, B, and C—hence the name. Activities are ranked upon these general criteria:

A – Tasks that are perceived as being urgent and important.
B – Tasks that are important but not urgent.
C – Tasks that are neither urgent nor important.
Each group is then rank-ordered in priority. To further refine priority, some individuals choose to then force-rank all “B” items as either “A” or “C”. ABC analysis can incorporate more than three groups. ABC analysis is frequently combined with Pareto analysis.

Pareto analysis

This is the idea that 80% of tasks can be completed in 20% of the disposable time. The remaining 20% of tasks will take up 80% of the time. This principle is used to sort tasks into two parts. According to this form of Pareto analysis it is recommended that tasks that fall into the first category be assigned a higher priority. The 80-20-rule can also be applied to increase productivity: it is assumed that 80% of the productivity can be achieved by doing 20% of the tasks. If productivity is the aim of time management, then these tasks should be prioritized higher.

POSEC method

POSEC is an acronym for Prioritize by Organizing, Streamlining, Economizing and Contributing. The method dictates a template which emphasizes an average individual’s immediate sense of emotional and monetary security. It suggests that by attending to one’s personal responsibilities first, an individual is better positioned to shoulder collective responsibilities.

PRIORITIZE-Your time and define your life by goals.
ORGANIZING-Things you have to accomplish regularly to be successful. (Family and Finances)
STREAMLINING-Things you may not like to do, but must do. (Work and Chores)
ECONOMIZING-Things you should do or may even like to do, but they’re not pressingly urgent. (Pastimes and Socializing)
CONTRIBUTING-By paying attention to the few remaining things that make a difference. (Social Obligations)

In the end, it comes down in really spitting out all of your ideas fully, in its totality, and then methodically attacking each task until its completion – easier said than done, trust me I know, but equipped with the right tools, and the right mindset, and a reduction in the wrong stresses/stressors, any task can be meet.

.:: LiBM ::.

Love

Relational Checkers

January 19, 2009 d dot b Leave a comment

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Relational Checkers

Putting them in ‘check’

No, not checkers as in the classic family board game, but in relationships. I always wondered why women who have a man, keep their other guy friends in the picture – someone they communicate with from time to time. At first, my thought that women kept these men as a “Plan B” – which, could still be the case in some situations; women has long used the Plan B dude for when their man acts up, or they lose interest in their man, and want to have some fun – yes women are strange creatures. But, I believe that when a woman is really feeling her man, and she has the other guy friends in the background, I suggest that it is a strategic move to keep her man in ‘check’. To plant the idea that if ‘you act up, there is someone waiting in the background to come to the light and take your position’. And to emphasize such thoughts, women usually will mention these background characters in passing conversations with their man, as a subtle reminder that embodies the spirit of the man-hating anthem sung by Beyonce’s “Irreplaceable”. Since women are such innovative pretty things, they have created different kinds of ‘checks’; available at their disposal to deploy and put their man in check. Each checker move has a metaphorical meaning from its implied literal simplicity, such as:

Edu Check

“Peter just finished Med School, and is going on to do his fellowship at the local hospital”
Interpretation: Get your ish together and do something with your life, or I’ll be making the good doc do my physical.

Attitude Check

“Samuel is so quiet and shy”
Interpretation: You talk to much, and it is really pissing me off as sometimes you put your big foot in your mouth

Fun Check

“Thomas is crazy, he is always getting himself into some sort of mischief”
Interpretation: You are getting kind of boring, you don’t excite or arouse me like you used to. But the thought of Thomas does …

Financial Check

“When Jason takes his girls out, they don’t have to worry about a thing – he takes care of them”
Interpretation: You need to spend more money and stop being a cheapskate – romance has to be financed … at a variable rate.

I am sure there are other witty checks that women use to correct and align men, I would love to hear some so that I can be better equip!

.:: LiBM ::.

Cre8ive Abstract, Logic, Social

I hate you all the time, time (not a grammatical error)

December 12, 2008 d dot b Leave a comment

The eternal battle with ‘time’

An account of time, and how it affects us

I don’t like time, it sits there ticking and tocking – second after second, minute after minute. Throughout the day, I have to consult with time to do every and anything – to see if time agrees with my proposed actions. I have pervasive feeling that time is not my friend, it is my ‘frenemy’; when times are tough it is against me, when I got deadlines approaching it is against me, and when I need more time to do something, it shows no mercy. Furthermore, time always seems to make good times go by fast, and for excruciating events go by at a turtle pace – time has a dynamic way of being sadistic (and not in the S&M way). Because of you ‘time’, I don’t know how to really relax – I always feel that there are a bunch of things behind me that are chasing me; things that I have to deal with, resolve, and rectify. Even in my sleep, I can not escape these things that chase me, and the chase only really ends ‘in a matter of time’, when I deal with the situation; but that is not the end of the chase, because where one thing stops, another one continues, or in my case, a new problem is created. Oh time, you create a burden on me that leads me to believe of ‘impending somethingness’, of which I must deal with.

I disdain you time, last time that I enjoyed time was …. I really got to think far back, but I remember a time around this summer where I went up North in the woods to a cottage. Nothing but clear skies, open lakes, and endless rows of trees – I remember really enjoying it, and I remember that for awhile, time was not my enemy, it was my friend, as I was with friends, throwing down beers and eating BBQ food. To me, time literally stood still; as wireless devices were turned off, watches were abandoned, and all the worries I had were left on the dirt road that we rode upon to reach our relaxing destination. Its funny, all the times were I recall that I enjoyed time was when I was out of my city, on vacation; I guess I need to reassess my perspective on not how time is against me all the time, but how I can make better usage of my time.

But as with most things, ‘easier said than done’, but I am a work in progress, just like the Mona Lisa, and perfection will yield itself in a matter of time.

Hip-Hop, Social, Swag, videos

Joe Budden says “F**k’ NY”

December 10, 2008 d dot b Leave a comment

Joe Budden says “F**k’ NY”

Hometown love, where has it gone?

Now, I get what Joe Budden is saying in this video – he has a qualm with cities not supporting homegrown talent. Apparently after a show that he was performing at with other New York artists, Joey felt that the crowd didn’t show love for their artists. Now the reason for that, could be varied (i.e. the artists did not perform well, etc.), but Joey concludes that the local fans does not support their artists; especially now, New York is in a transitional phase in hip-hop music where they are trying to reclaim that crown from the South. And being up here in the T Dot (Toronto), we are known for having the most haters per capita – we never show our own talent love & support; we always support the American acts when they come to our city to perform, and buy their CD’s when they drop, but when it comes to supporting our own, we never do. I see it all the time, as an event promoter putting on live music events, its very difficult to get people to come out to support their own; up here, we would rather go to a redundant club than go experience our peers performing.

However, it seems like in the South, they got it. From the mid 90’s, they have been supporting their own local acts – from Master P and his No Limit empire, to Baby and his Cash Money Records empire, for local shows in the South, hundreds of people would go and support their local acts; everything from clothing to CD’s. And now, the South pretty much runs hip-hop, some of it is not wanted though, but regardless they still run it. And I guess that Joey is looking for that Southern affection and behavior to seep up north – as it is logical to suggest that especially when New York is ‘down’, the city should rally around its promising talent to support it, nurture it, and aide in its growth (flower-like).

However, I guess on this cold, winter night, Joey felt New York didn’t represent like the days in the Boogie Down when hundreds would come out to the park, after dark, for two turntables, a mic, and a dope MC.

I feel ya pain bro.

.:: LiBM ::.

Swag

VLot Case #120: "Leave my cologne alone, its a little too strong for you to be putting on"

November 7, 2006 d dot b Leave a comment

“Leave my cologne alone, its a little too strong for you to be putting on”

From Lupe Fiasco ‘I Gotcha’ (2006)
a case study from www.vacantlot.org

Relates to ‘swagger jacking’. Swagger jacking can be described in adoring and borrowing one’s style, charisma; but more importantly, claiming that style and charisma as your own. Back in the day it would one would be labelled a ‘biter’.

Furthermore, this quote goes a bit deeper and suggests that one can not hold one’s weight; which is a direct shot to ‘swagger jackers’. Because if you are going to emulate someone; one best do a damn good job at being similar or better than the original, because if one does not look similar or better, the public will easily be able to identify the ‘fakeness’ in the perpetraitor. In the entertainment industry, many try to copy style of another, but it rarely works:
– New York imitating the Dirty South (i.e. Chicken Noodle soup, very wack)
– Everybody trying to get shot 9 times like 50 Cent (Beanie, Fabolous, and others)
– Madonna trying to adopt children, just like Angelina
– In the early 2000’s everybody was trying to get the ‘Neptunes’ sound (wack notables; Angie Martinez, Ray J)

On a lower-profile scale, many people have to go through the process of deciding whether to step in the shoes of another, primarily when it comes to filling roles: for example, becoming a responsible father, taking over the family business, a new job position, whatever the case is, assuming a new role whether by choice or not, can be a challenge.

As Lupe suggests, if it is a little too strong for you to handle, then symptoms will follow, commonly known as ‘coping’. Coping may manifest itself into certain types of behavior; withdrawal from certain social settings, anxiety, depressants (drugs, alcohol), and other behavior that is usually damaging. Thus, if one can not cope with the ‘cologne’ then another quote comes to mind; ‘If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the kitchen’.

Summation:
For the ones that are being bitten, there is a quote that suggests that ‘imitation is the greatest form of flattery’; however, this flattery may be indirectly (meaning, the one who is imitating will not likely directly admit to admiring the source’s). So, instead of getting mad or irrate because someone is ‘biting your style’, think of it as an accomplishment that someone would try to emulate your behaviour.

.: More lyrics and quotes at http://www.vacantlot.org/

Hip-Hop

VLot Case #118: "So I don’t give a f* what none of y’all n* say; Cause anything that can’t penetrate ricochets"

November 2, 2006 d dot b Leave a comment

“So I don’t give a f*** what none of y’all n*** say; Cause anything that can’t penetrate ricochets”
— Canibus ‘How We Roll’, 1998, a case study from www.vacantlot.org Intelli-Hip Hop

Self-esteem is a pertinent issue that affects all of us from childhood to adulthood. In childhood, our self-esteem is exposed to several ‘tests’ that either create a positive or negative self-esteem. Of course social, psychological, and environmental factors will all dictate how one responds to these ‘tests’. However, this proverbial wisdom quote refers to the ‘diss’ approach of self-esteem; that is discrediting a person’s character with insults that may be true or untrue. It is also worthy to note that these acts of discrediting is usually done directly and with a malicious nature (intent to afflict emo-pain).

Thus, this quote implies that one has a positive (high) self-esteem which translates into any attempts to lower their self-esteem is repelled. To attain this, one is confident in themselves; which may be also a sign that one only tries to lower another’s self-esteem because their self-esteem is also low – bringing one down may bring another up. Such individuals can be labelled shallow and transparent: which may explain why this quote suggests that insults are ricocheted back to the sender when one is mentally deep and understands their psyche.

.:: Find more quotes at www.vacantlot.org
An in-depth look at the quotes that affect our lives

Life in B Major

Tag Archives: attitude

React or Respond?

Reaction vs. Responding

That gets a ‘pass’ … really?