Within Range

You Fancy huh? Or Fast?

There has to exist some unwritten formula for common courtesy that states; if someone offers to buy you a meal, such meal must not be more than 100% more of what your meal costs. So if I am buying something that costs $2.75, then your max range for a similar item must be $5.25 – this is governed by the International Law of Non-Dirtbaggery and common sense. This makes sense right? I recently was a victim of this heinous offense, as someone went well out of range – especially when I didn’t even acknowledge that I would buy her meal! The nerve of some people, but as a gentleman I played it cool, and I would of covered the costs if it was in the acceptable range, but when it was upwards to 250% of my total value of my meal, that is when the line had to be drawn down in the sand. As Homey the Clown from In Living Color used to say, “Homey don’t play that”, so upon checkout, I paused and looked at her to give some money to her exuberant meal – to her dismay and embarrassment as she was fumbling for money to pay for her ‘royally’ expensive meal. And a lesson was learned, from both parties.

3 thoughts on “Within Range”

  1. Firstly, don’t refer to yourself as a gentleman because in this particular situation your behaviour was not gentlemanly. If you ask a young lady out, it is expected that you will pay for the meal, unless otherwise specified, at which point you pause and ask yourself why you’re asking her out in the first place if you have no money to pay for her meal. Secondly, and this is just my humble opinion, but a “royally expensive meal” would not cost under $10, which indicates that the real problem here is not that this young lady’s “fast” but rather that you’re just plain CHEAP! I can almost guarantee that the young lady was not “fumbling” for money at the counter because she didn’t have any (especially if she’s a lady like myself who’s fancy in every sense of the word, and works for and has her own), but rather that she was so appalled at your outrageous behaviour and ludicrous theory, that she was taken aback. There’s a very distinguishable difference between cheap and frugal and you are definitely the former. Ladies, please be warned…when you see warning signs such as these, you run for dear life and never look back!

  2. Christmas is approaching, you should go hide under your assigned rock b/c I know it must burn you having to spend money on your loved ones!

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