Category Archives: Love

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Love

The Wrong Valentine

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I’ve had messed up Valentine’s Day’s in the past, most notably getting dumped (however, she came back several weeks later ), but this year may have been my worse; not because of what happened to me, but because of what I may have caused, indirectly.

The night before the Valentine’s, I called up my ex-girl and told her that I would take her out out on Valentine’s Day; she did not have any boyfriend so I thought everything was cool. However, she was acting all stupid, saying ‘maybe’, giving me the runaround. So I say cool, and I keep it moving.

Valentine Day rolls around, and in the morning, my friend Joanne calls me up to tell me she got a link at a fancy restaurant and invited me to come – naturally, I agree. Couple hours pass, and the ex calls up and wants to know when I am coming by to pick her up …. , I’m like, you punked me last night, so I found alternate plans. She did not believe me at first, but when it finally sunk in, she began to get really mad. But I told her that you had your chance, you were being foolish, so I moved on. Conversation ended, I didnt really think anything of it.

Anyways, I go on the date to the classy restaurant with Joanne (oh yeah, who is the ‘Limited Dosage‘, check for the blog I wrote on ‘Limited Dosage’), and then the ex starts calling, texting, trying to interrupt my night. I ignore it. Realistically, I would have preferred to be with the ex, because I can really, really, really only handle Joanne in Limited Dosages. The following day rolls around, and I call the ex to see how she is, and I never really thought I had a strong affect on her anymore, but she was extremely hurt and saddened by my actions; she truly expected me to break off my plans for her, which I could of very easily, but chose not to. The ex was very irate and mad, and I began to understand that she had deeper feelings for me than she lead on.

However, if she wasn’t ‘playing around’ and acting foolish (which she claims that I should have known that she was acting that way) then things would have transpired differently. I kinda wish they had transpired differently because even though I was eating like a King, dining on savory food, and enjoying a rich ambient atmosphere … I wasn’t with my TRUE Valentine.

A Lesson Learned.

Peace.

Love, Relationships

The Conditional Engagement

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The Conditional Engagement Ring

Give it back if it doesn’t work


Came across an interesting moral question the other day when a friend of mine who is engaged, said that she would NOT give back an engagement ring if her engagement was broken. This kind of surprised me because I figured that a woman would give back an engagement ring because she would not want a symbolic reminder of a failed relationship. Perhaps maybe it was for the monetary value of the ring, but when I asked if that was the case, she was not concerned about the ring’s value; in hopes to pawn it off for some cheddar — her only reason for aspiring to retain such a ring is because it ‘looks nice’, aesthetically speaking.

 

However, my understanding of this whole marriage ish is that an engagement ring is a conditional offering; a man’s desire to wed his woman in the near future. I don’t think the ring can be labelled as a ‘gift’; flowers, candy, expensive jewellery are gifts, not an engagement ring — it has more significance than a ‘gift’, historically speaking (shot to those that want to label an engagement ring as a ‘gift’).

Historical Sense

From what I can find, the engagement ring was presided (created as a a formality) by Pope Innocent III in 1215 by the Fourth Lateran Council; their initial purpose were to preserve a ‘a visible division of social rank, ensuring only the privileged wore florid jewels’ (bastards) and to declare a longer waiting period between betrothal and marriage. Traditionally, it is a norm for the woman to return the ring if the engagements is called off, but in some cases (i.e. the man cheats) the woman is not obliged to return the ring — however in some U.S. states, the view is that the engagement ring is a conditional gift and that the ring SHOULD be returned under any circumstances.

Furthermore, if you want to get symbolic about the whole ‘marriage’ situation, the engagement ring is a symbol of the man’s property (i.e. the woman); the engagement ring is only worn by the woman as a symbol to other men that she is ‘taken’ (the man does not wear any symbol/ring until actual marriage); the ring shows that she is already tied to a man. Think of the engagement ring as a sign of ‘marked territory’; sort of like what a Lion or Tiger does, for the purposes of protecting their possession.

Thus you can fill out the strong symbolism and even emotional pulses one send’s out when you still desire to keep an engagement ring after the engagement is called off.

But if the ring is nice … I guess its cool, right? (feelings, emotions, sanity being absent of
course)

.:: Food for thought ::.

—
sources: wikipedia.com

Love, Relationships

Limited Dosage

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LIMITED DOSAGE
Tolerating the intolerable, but you still like her …

 

 

Ever encountered this ….

 

I have this lady friend; an attraction exists between both of us. Known each other for several months now, went out a couple of times, talk on the phone regularly (at times). Now, everything is cool about her, except that at times I can’t stand her; not in the aspect that we argue and/or bicker towards each other, but its just that at times her behavior and interests seem to be so distant from mines. Talking only about the latest fashions, desiring to only role in the flyest cars, aspiring to hang around celebrities, seem to be the depth of her intelligence at times (coincidentally, especially in public). And on a one-on-one, its like a completely different chick emerges; one who is knowledgeable, educated, introspective.

So I guess the problem exists in a public setting – once that is removed, I guess I should have no issues right? However, she always wants to go out here and there; especially because she inhabits the urban downtown core where she is accessible to everything. And I at times, like to go out and would like a fly chick by my side.

To move closer, would mean spending more time with her doing the things that ‘couples do’, but I don’t think I can tolerate her in a high dosage (talking everyday, seeing each other frequently, etc.). And I feel that she wants to move closer, however, I can only stomach her in limited dosages; dosages that satisfy my needs …

 

Is this wrong?

Love, Relationships

Women, and their self-fulfulling prophecy of misery Pt. 1

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I am not really one to be writing about relationships and crap, but I figured I will give it a try.

Quick run-down:
Boy knows girl for several years; they kept in touch but sporadically. Girl felt like Boy was just going after her goodies; which was kinda true, but over time – boy matured and girl felt that level of maturity, so girl and boy start talking. However, Girl has broken up with her ex 6-8 months) before girl reconnects with boy. Girl likes Boy, vice versa. Girl thinks and professes that boy is great, ideal, and really likes Boy (also thinks that Boy is a great communicator, compromiser, and intelligent) – thus, girl initiates a date. On date both have a good time, enjoy each others company, date ends with a kiss. However, girl is overwhelmed with feelings of joy/bliss, but is conflicted with her ex (mind you, who cheated and disrespected her). Thus, girl panics and freaks out (which I dont understand). Ignores Boy for several weeks and ignores his phone calls. Finally, Girl sees the errs in her ways, and contacts Boy and says that she is sorry for her actions, but Boy is upset that girl would treat her this way … sorry for the ‘quick run-down’

Now, besides knowing that naturally, women are generally screwed; as is, they have no idea of knowing what they want in life and/or a man. Why can’t women acknowledge and respect when they have a good thing in their life. If girl felt this way, knowing that boy is understanding and is a good communicator, girl should have told boy her feelings – NOT ignore boy like a chicken head (or insert appropriate regional word). That is my qualm. Every action is a reciprocal equal or greater action, and though Boy wishes Girl good luck, i’m sure Boy wishes her some equal/greater treatment as she showed to him, by some other boy … ya dig??

Lemme know what y’all think (women: sorry for the generalizations, but you know what it is already!!).