Contractors Hyperbole

The Language of Contractors

I find the Home Improvement Industry to be a very challenging field, its either ‘Do-It Yourself’ or hire a Contractor. This post will focus on the latter, and their interesting rhetoric. Recently had to ‘monitor’ (be present) at my Mother’s house while several contractors vied for a chance to complete a floor tiling project; and I have noticed several ‘Talking Points’ that ALL Contractors seem to have. So here are some Talking Points that I have observed, and my interpretation of what they really mean:

“I know a guy that can do that for you”
– means that he can’t do it himself, so he worked out a deal with someone that he knows, and will take a percentage

“His work is very very good, amazing”
– this claim will hardly never be validated, who is really going to take the time to view strangers houses?

“Its not going to cost you, its going to cost me”
– it will still cost YOU, but probably in the long run

“I’m giving you the best possible price – I’m not making any money”
– even at the baseline cost, I’m still making money, sucka!

“These things happen from time to time”
– I f#cked up, and since you don’t know shit about this industry, I will blame it on ‘natural circumstance’

“Unlike other contractors who would just tell you anything, I’m being honest with you”
– I’m saying this to gain your confidence, but I am more like the contractors that I have tarnished

In all, I have to give it up to the Contractors, they have realized how they are viewed amongst the general public as sleezy, corrupt, ex-con, dirtbags; thus, there probably was some ‘Contractor Meeting’ a few years ago where they adopted some psychological rhetoric as they try to get into their customers heads and try to distance themselves from the perception of their own industry.

Kinda clever.


<<< Wish this was how all Contractors looked like, then, I wouldn’t really have that much of a problem with ’em.

.:: LiBM ::.

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