Get your Sue on

Getting our sue on

Some funny legal cases from http://www.re-quest.net/g2g/humor/cases/

We have, and will probably always be in a litigious era where lawyers run rampant trying to sue over every little thing.  This leads to a tie up of our judicial system, which in turns causes taxpayers more money; and now, more than ever, we need to find ways to save money.  Anyhow, enjoy: 

United States ex rel. Gerald Mayo v. Satan and His Staff
54 F.R.D. 282 (W.D. Penn. 1971)
A Real Devil of a Litigant. Plaintiff filed suit against Satan and his staff for violation of his civil rights. Among the allegations were: (1) that Satan had on numerous occasions caused him misery and unwarranted threats, all against his will; (2) that Satan had placed deliberate obstacles in his path that caused Plaintiff’s downfall; and (3) that by reason of the foregoing acts, Satan had deprived him of his constitutional rights.
The court noted that, “Even if plaintiff’s complaint reveals a prima facie recital of the infringement of the civil rights of a citizen of the United States, the Court has serious doubts that the complaint reveals a cause of action upon which relief can be granted by the court.”
The court went on about its concerns and further noted, “We question whether plaintiff may obtain personal jurisdiction over the defendant in this judicial district …. the plaintiff has failed to include with his complaint the required form of instructions for the United States Marshal for directions as to service of process.”
Case dismissed as frivolous.

Carter v. United States
530 U.S. 255, 185 F.3d 863 (2000)

Playboy Mystery Writer Unveiled? In a dissenting opinion, Justice Ruth Ginsberg wrote, “The Court’s woodenly literal construction gives rise to practical abnomalies and effectively shrinks the jury’s choices while enlarging the prosecutor’s options.”

Ruth v. Congress of the United States
71 F.R.D. 676 (D. N.J. 1976)
Right to a Speedy Trial? Plaintiff, while a guest in the federal penitentiary in Atlanta, filed suit, in pro per, against the U.S. Congress. Among his allegations were the constitutionality of a number of statutes dealing with the salaries, retirement pay, survivors’ benefits, etc., of Judges, U.S. Attorneys, Clerks, Marshals, and others; and that he was unjustly tried and convicted in both Federal and State courts because the charges against him were processed and tried by the court and staff in an extremely rapid manner, failing to consider all issues, due to the fact that the court “was overworked and under paid.”
Case dismissed as frivolous.

Koutsouradis v. Delta Airlines
___ F.4d ___ (11th Cir. 2005)
Batteries Included. A 36 year old married woman filed a lawsuit against Delta Airlines for being publicly humiliated after she boarded a Delta Airlines flight with her husband in Dallas, Texas on a stop over from Las Vegas, Nevada to her home in Clearwater, Florida. After boarding, the woman surprising heard her name being called on the plane’s P.A. system asking her to identfy herself and to please come forward. Alarmed, the woman complied, and was greeted by a Delta security agent who informed her that something in her luggage was vibrating. The woman was escorted off of the plane by the security agent and lead to the tarmack next to the plane where her luggage had been placed. The woman explained to the security agent that the vibrating must be from an adult toy she purchased while in Las Vegas. The security agent, not being satisfied with this representation, made the woman remove the toy from the luggage and hold it up for inspection, in full view of curious passengers looking out the windows of the plane as well as in front of a few Delta ground personnel who, as the complaint alleges, “began laughing hysterically.” The woman was allowed to repack her luggage and return to her seat on the plane. Albeit, a little red faced we’re sure.

Check out http://www.re-quest.net/g2g/humor/cases/ for more funny and dumb cases! 

 

.:: LiBM ::.

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